Biblical Sexualities: part 2

"What is 'The Kinsey Scale?'

The Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale, sometimes referred to as the “Kinsey Scale,” was developed by Alfred Kinsey and his colleagues Wardell Pomeroy and Clyde Martin in 1948, in order to account for research findings that showed people did not fit into neat and exclusive heterosexual or homosexual categories." (http://www.kinseyinstitute.org/research/ak-hhscale.html)

Bisexuality and Pan-sexuality

Bisexuality and Pan-sexuality, in Biblical terms are a bit harder to deal with because they are orientations never specifically mentioned. On the other hand, hey may also be the easiest to deal with, because they are rather nonspecific. What I mean to say, is that Bisexuality and Pan-sexuality are much more fluid that strict heterosexuality or strict homosexuality. People who identify as Bisexual claim to be attracted to both males and females; Pan-sexuals are attracted to people regardless of gender (consider it as being attracted to men, women, transsexuals, neutrois, the androgynous, etc.).

First let's deal with Bisexuality only; life is easier this way. Okay, to begin with, the Bible never actually mentions bisexuality. The problem is that the Bible discusses Heterosexuality favorably (arguably, as discussed in the previous edition), and Homosexuality unfavorably (as we will discuss in the next edition). Because Bisexuality spans both Hetero- and Homosexuality, it is a bit unfair to say that the Bible either condones or condemns Bisexual behavior. It would be arguably more accurate to claim that the Bible smiles upon those who engage in heterosexual behavior, yet frowns on those who engage in homosexual behavior. Therefore, could it be said that the Bible does not frown on Bisexuals who date those people of the opposite sex? On the opposite hand, few fundamentalists would disagree if I said that the Bible DOES frown upon Bisexuals who date those of the same sex.

So, as long as Bisexuals deny, discipline, and/or try to overcome half of their sexuality, they pass under the radar, because as far as anyone knows, they are functionally Heterosexual.

Now, Pan-sexuality is a slight bit harder to deal with. In an effort to better illustrate some issues that are exclusive to Pan-sexuality, let me tell two short, real (as in they've actually happened) stories. First, an example from my own life:

I was in a relationship with a man for over four years and most everything was good and pretty much normal. This was, until my boyfriend informed me that he has come to terms with his being transgendered. He was a woman in a man's body. She has now legally changed her name and begun hormone therapy. Hypothetically, had we continued dating, would that have constituted Homosexuality, because she is now technically female?

Another story, in which I will change the names to protect the innocent, begins with a friend of mine from school. Meagan began talking to this guy on the internet. She liked him and he liked her, and everything was fine and normal. This was, until Richard told Meagan that he was transgendered. He was born female, but had now been through the whole process of hormone therapy and is male except for the actual sexual reassignment surgery. Because Richard was born female, does his dating a woman constitute Homosexuality?

As food for thought, I would pose these questions. Are these events the same? Do they really constitute events of Homosexuality/ same sex Pan-sexuality? Is dating someone who is transgendered/neutrois defined under the blanket term of sexual immorality?

These people are not unlovable. In fact, they need the love of God just like everyone else, perhaps even more so. Perhaps there is a reason that there are people who are willing to seek love in any format. There is no sin in wanting to be loved.

Biblical Sexualities: part 1

So, I have a friend who likes to get on a soap-box about how the Bible condemns homosexuality. Now, I have read the Bible cover to cover (except for about half of psalms and proverbs). There were some interesting finds, familiar stories and long rambling lists. Here though, I would like to discuss the views of the Biblical stance on the spectrum of sexualities as we understand it today. Let's start with the easy one:

Heterosexuality

Genesis 2:24 and Mark 10:7 state that "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." This passage is one of the most quoted in reference to the Bible's PRO stance on heterosexuality. The "reason" in question is found in the previous verse in Genesis: "The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man.'" Now, some people will also tell you that even though this particular woman was Eve, she was not Adam's first wife. Many cultures believe that Adam's first wife was a woman named Lilith, who was created at the same time as man, and not after from his rib. The legends surrounding Lilith tell of how she refused to submit to Adam and went as far to lie with Archangel Samael. One question that this raises is "Why did Adam have to have a new wife?" Aside from the fact that his first wife was a cheating whore, she was also the first feminist. So, does the Bible condemn feminists, whores, or women? Well, it's accepted that women are not condemned. The Bible does talk about promiscuous women and how they are foolish, sinful, and should be stoned to death, however, God commanded one of his servants, Hosea, to marry a whore, ergo it's possible that they can be redeemed. Several times throughout the Bible though, author's discuss women being subordinate to men, so who knows on the feminism note?

Anyway, we're discussing heterosexuality, not feminism. Many people never make it to the point of the Bible advocating heterosexuality, only the point of it condemning homosexuality. Paul, a disciple of Christ, tells the church in Corinth that "It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command." (1 Corinthians 7:1-6) Now we're getting somewhere. Here, Paul advocates celibacy, which will be discussed in a later section of this discussion. The interesting thing though is that Paul promotes marriage only because of immorality. Why would he do this? Was the sexual immorality he combating homosexuality, as many people believe, or was is promiscuity? Honestly, which seems more likely in this context?

Do I really have to answer for you? Really? Okay, *sigh* it's promiscuity, prostitution, frequent unprotected sexual activities among multiple individuals which often results in spreading STDs, STIs, children that parents can't afford, and lots of mental trauma.

So, while Paul does set up a heterosexual model, he does so out of concession not only for health reasons, but also for the primary logical reason, that heterosexuality is the only childbearing model of sexuality that we have.

And there we go. It doesn't sound as great as it did in my head, but it'll serve for now. Open comments time!

Crazy Love

I am currently finishing reading the book Crazy Love, by Francis Chan. Throughout this reading, I feel as though I have been personally challenged to change the way I live. Mostly (and this is personal) in the area of generosity. I think that God has convicted my heart because I am not a generous person, and thus I want to change. I know that God has allowed me to experience life in a unique way, a set of experiences that no one else has exactly. God has placed in my hands specific tools to do a specific work with. No one else can do the job that I was made for; no one else can connect with the people like I can in the encounters that He has planned in my life.

And every individual has a unique, God-given set of life-tools that only they can wield. Imagine what life would be like if every individual actually lived out their life, not to their fullest, but to God’s fullest. News flash: God can do more with your life than you ever could on your own. Imagine actually being able to see through God’s eyes, naturally loving every person with all your heart, without a second thought. How amazing would that be?

So, from here on out, I have decided to take a step of faith. Along with my regular tithe, I am going to give more freely on a daily basis. Whether it is a dollar to a stranger at the gas pump, or the person behind me in the restaurant, it does not even matter. God blesses what we give, not only to whom we give it, but the givers as well. I don’t know about you, but I need more God in my life. I need more crazy love, more awesome power, more Jesus in my daily life.

So, what are you going to do?

Faith, by Jesus

I was told this story once. It begins with the common knowledge that sermons are often borrowed and reused, rather than a preacher always writing their own "new" material. One preacher in particular decided that he was just going to get a copy of a particular sermon and read it verbatim to his congregation. Now, during his sermon, one particular church member thought that this message sounded awfully familiar, but he could not place where he had heard it before. After the preacher finished and the service was concluded, the man asked the preacher where he got his material from that morning. The preacher opened his Bible and pointed to Jesus' sermon on the mount.

I think it is amazing how little "Christians" actually know about what Jesus taught while he was here on Earth. We all know about his miracles. I would be willing to bet that any regular church goer could list off at least three of Jesus' miracles without much thought. How many though, could tell you what Jesus thought about politics, history, people in general? What did Jesus say about the Law of Moses? Etc. Etc. Etc. . .

All this makes me wonder why when people claim to have a relationship with the living God, the God of the Universe, who walked through the pages of the Bible, they will not even take time out of their day to read what He actually said. In a way, it sickens me. I think that it is detestable to claim that you love God and have a relationship with Jesus Christ and have never once read for yourself what He, himself came all this way to teach us. I mean, really!

Expectations

Expectations. We all have them. We place them on ourselves and others, and others place them on us. It was during my first year of college that I realized that my entire life up to that point had been governed by others' expectations of me. For example, even though I was told from a young age "you can have whatever job you want when you grow up," what I was really being told was: "you can have any job you want as long as you make six figures a year, have a college degree, and don't have children." It's a far cry from the encouraging bullshit we all get fed as youngsters. I am just personally amazed that I fell for it for so long, mostly because I have always been told that I am quite intelligent and insightful; gullible was absent from the list.

Of course people who manipulate others' lives, even unintentionally, never want to let the victim know that they are being manipulated; because once the oppressed knows of the oppression, the oppressor loses their power. It is truly amazing how ingrained this simple oppressive force is in our everyday lives. The worse for utilizing this dominating force is elders in one's family. They always say that they have the best of intentions in mind, and often, yes, they do. However, the dialogue between human and human is instantly altered once it occurs between younger and older blood. The older wants to look out for and help the younger, while the younger just wants to learn life's lessons on their own. Truth be told, they won't retain many lessons until they learn them themselves anyway. Sad, isn't it? Anyway, time for a personal application.

As I stated earlier, up until now I have allowed my life to be run by others' expectations of me. I never realized that the primary reason I scored well in school was because I was told to; I got a job because I was told to; I acted like "the good girl" because I was told to; I even applied for college because I was told to. And most recently, I have "visited" members of my family more often this summer than an prior, because I have been told to. Truth be told, I'm sick of being told what to do with my life, especially by people who aren't living it! I mean, really! A stranger cannot tell one what to do, an acquaintance cannot tell one what do, and no more right does a family member have to tell one what to do. I am tired. I am tired of trying to please people who cannot be pleased. I am tired of trying to live up to expectation that I cannot met. I am tired.

My mind is weary. My spirit hangs by a thread. I am officially warn out, and I don't want to go on like this any more. I can't keep living a life that's not mine, defending a person who I don't know. It's no wonder why I have identity issues. I don't know who I am. How many lives am I forced to try to live out? With so many people I am obligated to try to be, which one is the real me? I don't even know who I am, what I want. And now I am just beginning to find the real me, somewhere deep inside this locked heart of mine. All I want, is to finally be me, and it seems like that's the one thing I cannot have.

Such is life, I suppose. I just want to be the typical teenager; I want to declare my independence, be my own person, live my own life, on my own. Sometimes, I guess that that is too much to ask. I don't even know anymore.